They're Back - Dreaming 15 months later

15 months and counting past the injury. It's super odd how the pieces just keep coming together. things I didn't realize were missing until they suddenly reappear. In the last month I've been deluged with dreams. I hadn't realized I had stopped having them until suddenly they came back. It's as if that part of my brain is now in overdrive and trying to make up for lost time. My dreams are different than any dreams I have ever had, and at least one part of them are re-occurring. I've had several very vivid dreams where I can't tell if I'm dreaming or if I'm awake. Over and over again I find myself trying to wake myself up from a dream only to find myself waking up in a dream state. I've explained before, probably in my blog on sweetlife4me-jp.blogspot.com, that for a large part of last year I felt I was trying to swim up from the ocean floor, yet wasn't getting very far. I call it "swimming in glue". My dreams now are a lot like swimming in glue. Maybe a part of me wishes it was all just a dream, maybe a part of me is afraid the recovery itself is just a dream. Although the dreams have not been scary in nature, the inability to ascertain reality from fantasy in my dream is very disturbing. In a way it does describe how I felt for a large part of last year. I felt like I would take two steps forward, to fall five steps behind. Recovery was a lot like taking an escalator to no where, and wearing myself out trying to get there.Finding new pieces is like opening a gift every few weeks. I like getting things back that I've lost.